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Zone 3 Press, the literary magazine of Austin Peay State University
Volume 39, Issue 1
Volume 39, Issue 1

I’m Agender Which Means I’m Nothing And Everything at Once Which Means I’m Intangible Until the Right Touch Comes Along

  • By Carson Sandell 

not lack of 	more so 	a breath of light through stained glass
							than anything else

a boy who is not a boy but doesn’t know that yet rests his tongue on the          
     hairy edge of my areola   
        as his fingers tiptoe down to my plaid boxers        which stay on	
they always stay on-	     looking at my lovers with their single button		


he says babe just a peek     which means   trust me  	which means
                 he is an impatient  long con     chaser 		
I say no you haven’t met the sweet nothings quota  which means  no words 
     will
      be poetic enough  which means  this two night motel room love is not
enough 			 I ask him what am I to you		
                                               he says a beautiful woman	
   I repeat what am I
	to you  I am a woman  to me I am hericium bursting from the rotten
stomach		of overturned oaks		the first maple to feel
       a spigot’s rusted suction 				
                                                        he says whatever
you want to be	           which means	        	he is not ready
	when he asks what are you				
                                  which means 		this body is only  
          a body		  when the bottom of his fingers calloused
stroke 		    something 	        	he doesn’t understand

About Carson Sandell

Carson Sandell (they/them) is a queer and trans poet from San Jose, CA. They graduated from University of California Riverside with a B.A. in Creative Writing. Carson is an MFA student
in Poetry at San Diego State University. Outside of academics they are a Poetry Reader for Split Lip Magazine and Poetry Editor at Poetry is Currency. Most nights you will find them curled up watching a horror movie with a glass of wine.

Zone 3 Press, the literary magazine of Austin Peay State University
Volume 39, Issue 1
Volume 39, Issue 1

I’m Agender Which Means I’m Nothing And Everything at Once Which Means I’m Intangible Until the Right Touch Comes Along

  • By Carson Sandell 

not lack of 	more so 	a breath of light through stained glass
							than anything else

a boy who is not a boy but doesn’t know that yet rests his tongue on the          
     hairy edge of my areola   
        as his fingers tiptoe down to my plaid boxers        which stay on	
they always stay on-	     looking at my lovers with their single button		


he says babe just a peek     which means   trust me  	which means
                 he is an impatient  long con     chaser 		
I say no you haven’t met the sweet nothings quota  which means  no words 
     will
      be poetic enough  which means  this two night motel room love is not
enough 			 I ask him what am I to you		
                                               he says a beautiful woman	
   I repeat what am I
	to you  I am a woman  to me I am hericium bursting from the rotten
stomach		of overturned oaks		the first maple to feel
       a spigot’s rusted suction 				
                                                        he says whatever
you want to be	           which means	        	he is not ready
	when he asks what are you				
                                  which means 		this body is only  
          a body		  when the bottom of his fingers calloused
stroke 		    something 	        	he doesn’t understand
Volume 39, Issue 1
Volume 39, Issue 1

I’m Agender Which Means I’m Nothing And Everything at Once Which Means I’m Intangible Until the Right Touch Comes Along

  • By Carson Sandell 

not lack of 	more so 	a breath of light through stained glass
							than anything else

a boy who is not a boy but doesn’t know that yet rests his tongue on the          
     hairy edge of my areola   
        as his fingers tiptoe down to my plaid boxers        which stay on	
they always stay on-	     looking at my lovers with their single button		


he says babe just a peek     which means   trust me  	which means
                 he is an impatient  long con     chaser 		
I say no you haven’t met the sweet nothings quota  which means  no words 
     will
      be poetic enough  which means  this two night motel room love is not
enough 			 I ask him what am I to you		
                                               he says a beautiful woman	
   I repeat what am I
	to you  I am a woman  to me I am hericium bursting from the rotten
stomach		of overturned oaks		the first maple to feel
       a spigot’s rusted suction 				
                                                        he says whatever
you want to be	           which means	        	he is not ready
	when he asks what are you				
                                  which means 		this body is only  
          a body		  when the bottom of his fingers calloused
stroke 		    something 	        	he doesn’t understand

About Carson Sandell

Carson Sandell (they/them) is a queer and trans poet from San Jose, CA. They graduated from University of California Riverside with a B.A. in Creative Writing. Carson is an MFA student
in Poetry at San Diego State University. Outside of academics they are a Poetry Reader for Split Lip Magazine and Poetry Editor at Poetry is Currency. Most nights you will find them curled up watching a horror movie with a glass of wine.

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